The best of times, the worst of times....

This year in many ways has been the best year of my life and it’s also been the worst. Suffice it to say, the reason this has been the best year of my life is because I have been hovering in this fantastic creative headspace since January and it is intoxicating. I highly recommend it!

This has also been a very challenging year as I watch my parents struggle through the last moments of their life. My Father has suffered with mental health issues for many years. Anxiety has eaten away at his nervous system over the years, possibly caused by a life of being a self employed musician having to support a family of 6 as well as supporting dozens of musicians through his school and orchestra, or maybe just because he was physically prone to an anxiety disorder. We don’t know and we likely won’t ever know. He was also diagnosed with Alzheimer’s disease a few years ago and more recently, Cancer. This past week he tried to end his life. He wasn’t successful. The family continues to cope and we try to support him in the best way we know how. These moments in life require our full attention.

We will all lose our parents one day, and many of you may have already. It is a very difficult time, a time to be as awake as you can be.

My Father is in the hospital and will remain there until we can find someplace for him that is safe for him to live out his days.

I will most likely never hear him play piano again.

The best of times, the worst of times ~ all part of the twisting and turning of living.

For those of you going through a challenging time, you are not alone.
Reach out and talk to people.
You can’t underestimate the power of love.
Wishing for you the strength to handle life's challenges.

This is a picture of my Dad in much better times, sitting at the piano I learned to play on and that I now have in my living room.
This is the Dad I'll remember in my quietest moments.

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2 comments

  • Danny

    Danny

    Carrie: Definitely a lot to chew on. You're amazing, being able to keep your head up in such a trying time. My deepest sympathies to you and your family. Thank you for all your kinds words and encouragement during my dark times as well.

    Carrie:

    Definitely a lot to chew on. You're amazing, being able to keep your head up in such a trying time. My deepest sympathies to you and your family. Thank you for all your kinds words and encouragement during my dark times as well.

  • Clarissa Barth

    Clarissa Barth

    Oh, I'm sorry about your father's health problems. I was moved by the picture and your writing, makes me think about my own childhood memories so distant now. Wishing you strength and light to go through this and better times ahead. Always.

    Oh, I'm sorry about your father's health problems. I was moved by the picture
    and your writing, makes me think about my own childhood memories so
    distant now. Wishing you strength and light to go through this and better
    times ahead. Always.

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